Beware, or I'll eat you alive.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Misunderstandings, Age & The Internet~~~~an Editorial~~~

Sweet Things I've come to post an explanation and a Post script to the Editorial that I have posted below.

When I wrote it it was in response to comments made by a "Web Log" friend that may have been taken out of context and in my response with this Editorial I have made the same error, and for that I apologize.

If anything this should be taken as a learning lesson.

The basis for my Editorial still stands, for I am afraid for many young people, teens and pre-teens who are trying to be accepted by their peers and are still developing their Social interactions and skills.

Unfortunately the Internet creates "fast friendships" that develop like short news sound bites, much like the "Three Month Romance", and when the bloom is off "Pow" feelings are hurt, there is accusations and recriminations flying.

I do not want to see a "Thought Police" environment created, but I feel the need that Schools should teach to young people, besides the basic "3 R's" social etiquette and Netiquette and offer resources to those young people who feel they are being 'hurt' or pursued by their peers.

For young people do not have the skills or the strength to learn to "stand alone" and think independently, so great is this need to 'fit in'. The Internet among young people, can destroy independent thinking and the Internet does not teach young people that what they write is out there for all the world to see.

I and other adults have skills to protect ourselves, we can learn to protect ourselves and be independent and there are still on the Internet mature people who will take the time to try and understand what one is saying, who will go past the hurt and anger and ask questions and offer the "Peace Pipe" of wisdom and understanding.

I am glad that I have those "Web Log" friends and if I have mistakenly hurt them, I do apologize.

Sweet things, I’ve discovered again and again and again something about the Internet.

Without personal interaction, personal direct human touch interaction, it is too easy to mis-interpret things, also with the workings of each individual section of it, what one would think is a ‘private’ response is not. Especially if a setting is set to not be monitored, which is something I prefer to do because I like to respect privacy even for other people.

It’s like talking on an “old fashion party line”, if that monitoring is not set and what would be said in a friendly way but without the sense or idea of how it is said, can easily be taken or misinterpreted the wrong way.

That is the one aspect the Internet takes away from developing any sort of ‘friendship’. One does not see a face or hear a voice or the tone of the voice or the demeanor of the person.

Because of that sweet things, the Internet creates a lack of understanding between people, a true lack of interaction. It also develops and creates poor social skills; Emily Post is completely out the window.

I pity the generation that is totally engrossed in basing anything including relationships or friendships, on the Internet. I can understand how young teenagers, dealing with such web sites as Face book and my space or even allowing comments on a Blog web site, can be so seriously affected as to have their lives totally destroyed, and even in one case, commit suicide.

In the “old days” when people would write real letters, or type them, they would express themselves but ‘friends’, if they didn’t understand fully what was being said would write back and ask “What is it that you are trying to say? I don’t understand, can you clarify this for me?” By asking those questions they would really be working to understand what a person is saying without prejudging.

And that is the greatest mistake with the Internet. People are too quick to pre-judge. Because of that it adds shallowness to their personality.

Perhaps I am also pre-judging, but I've had this happen several times before and I made the mistake of trying to "fix it" and only received contempt in return.

There is a saying "fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me" but I tried for a third time---I must be a glutton for punishment, but now no more.

I’ve found that I have had the best interaction, an honest give and take, when I’m talking to real people, face to face. But because of the Internet it has destroyed that ability among many people, especially young people.

I’ve seen too many teenagers behave in a manner that would infuriate the patience of a saint. I am no saint, but even I am infuriated.

And what is even worse is that this developing manner has also infected the older generations, the 20, 30, 40 and even some 50 year olds.

And speaking of age, one can be old when they are 20 or remain immature even into their 50’s; it depends upon personal life experiences, circumstances, and even “raw deals”.

One wants to retain the zest of youth, but one has to grow up and face responsibilities and the demands of life, as well as the affects of aging, bad knees, fading eye sight, high blood pressure, ulcers, diabetes, crippling arthritis, heart disease and other ailments that age is heir to.

Wisdom only comes with life experience, and learning from mistakes. But the Internet and its lack of personal interaction denies people any true understanding of one another and it denies wisdom or learning or life experience.

Instead, “Internet people” are quick to turn upon one another at the slightest mis-interpretation. And that keeps them immature at any age because the Internet is also immature. Why? Because the Internet takes away the “human touch” which can never be re-created.

I had hoped for something better, instead once again I have been disappointed. I will again disappear into the shrouding mist of the San Francisco fog. I may emerge again someday, maybe.

On March 21st, on my 32nd birthday, this Web Log will be deleted.

I will not expose myself to anyone on the Internet like this ever again.


Post Script:

Although I say in my Editorial that I will delete this Web Log, I have changed my mind and will keep it up. I have received many positive comments from "Web Log" Friends who enjoy what I have to say and what I have experienced.

But now I need to take a hiatus, I've come down with a very nasty cold and need to get well---that may have been part of the reason why I reacted the way I did, instead of thinking things carefully, again another lesson learned.

Fram, ChickGeek, Mean Kitty and everyone---Thank you for taking the time to hold out the hand of Friendship and Understanding, it gladdens my heart.

1 comment:

TheChicGeek said...

I'm glad you have changed your mind, Diva. You are a very interesting person and I look forward to reading what you have to say. As a matter of fact, I will add you to my following list :)

It's very true the internet poses difficulties with not being able to see could be talking to a 90-year-old man that says he's a woman and vice versa. In a way, perhaps it's good to sort of have a "wake up call." It reminds us all of the dangers of the internet and to be aware of what we are posting and how it might affect others. I appreciate your comments.
One thing that I'm not sure I totally agree with you on is the part about the young people. I do feel they try to "fit in" and post some dangerous things. I have an 18-year-old daughter, and actually, I think the internet makes her more outspoken, but in a good way. She is not afraid to express herself and I do admire that about her. So I suppose like with everything there can be positive and negative outcomes.
Thanks for giving us some great things to think about! I hope you feel better soon :)