Beware, or I'll eat you alive.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

I have not forgotten all of you~~~

Hello Sweet Things,

Has it been two weeks since I last posted? Yes it has.

So much has happened, helping Yoshi, helping Lillian, helping Lynda, helping my co-workers and my clients. I am tired.

I went into work early today, good thing too, not that I have a back log but just a lot to clear away.

Just a quick update, Joe and I are doing fine. I need to let you all in on how things are going on that front, but I'm too tired to type beyond this short post.

The rain and cold and pollen have taken their toll on me and my sinuses. But taking the medication is worse for me, so I'll just 'deal with it'.

This weekend all I'm going to do is sleep, sleep and more sleep until I can't sleep any more. It will be a do nothing weekend. A vacation from work and home. I don't even want to drive any place.

My caretakers at my country home are doing fine, even Buddy the dog that we rescued, I've been told that he's like a puppy now, getting vitamins, and really good food and everything.

The repairs on the house is going just fine, they sent me video feed of what has been done, and I'm please and so is the Historical Society.

Come May 1 is the start for my Summer Season, and I'm going to have to plan on things, and squeeze in my sister's graduation party. Finally her Bachelors in Business but back to school for her for her Master's.

So much that my mind is whirling.

But now my most important thing is Dinner----I think I'll order delivery---Yes, the good old standby---Chinese!!!

Kisses, Sweet Things and more to come, when I'm up to writing.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Made a mistake

Hello Sweet Things,

And to one Sweet Thing in particular.

I had received a comment that was nice, it simply said "Hello---nice to meet you" but signed with little square boxes.

I made the mistake of accidentally rejecting it instead of posting it. And I do apologize.

I had a very late night last night, I was with my friend Yoshi, and she was in tears, her Father, who had been in Hospice for the last few weeks had died.

She had to be the rock for her family to see that the right things were done, and she had no one to console her as she was doing the consoling for everyone else----I understand her feelings as she is my friend from college and more than once she said "Who cares for the Caregiver?"

So I was the support and consoler for her, but I only had a few hours sleep, and need to run errands today, but I should know than to make "little tiny moves" using a computer. And so I accidentally deleted/rejected the comment.

My apologies to you Whomever you maybe. Please comment again and I will be more careful.

Joe and I had our talk and I have to say the outcome was and is positive. We are both in a place that we are happy with.

I will post on that later, when my mind is working a bit better. But now I need to go back to Yoshi and help her, I promised her I would. This is not an easy time, and I need to be there for her.

Kisses Sweet Things.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Thoughts and Decisions~~~~

Hello Sweet Things,

Dad is now baptized a Catholic! Mom is Happy! Baby Sis and fiancé Ted are Happy! And so am I!

Bit by bit over the nearly 2 years that have passed, a cloud that had covered my parents house for most of their married life and for our formative years, has finally lifted, Mother seems to credit me with being the cathartic effect that started Dad’s transformation, but I have always felt that it was there, Dad just had to take that chance to change, I think young Alex, at Dad’s work was and is very helpful, he showed Dad the way.

I think I was just the “consciousness” that he needed to help him make that decision. But I know many people will ask “Why Catholic?” Well it was the religious belief that Mother grew up in and had the strongest convection with, in many ways for Dad, it gives him the structure he still needs but without being a dictator, it also gives him the freedom to freely celebrate all those religious points of redemption with love.

I know that with all the news stories of pedophile priests and the inaction of the current pope when he was a cardinal it makes the Catholic church look vile, but what people forget is that pedophiles occur in any religious belief, there are pedophile ministers in protestant churches, the same with Rabbis’, Imams, Scout masters, baby sitters, teachers in private and public schools, coaches, you name it, they are everywhere. So why should one religious group be singled out of all the others, people forget you will find pedophiles everywhere.

Dad feels it’s because the leaders of the church were not aggressive to weed them out, but it is also true of other churches and organizations. It is not so much a church, as keeping faith in one’s religious beliefs; we make the mistake of putting leaders religious, political, or organizational on pedestals forgetting that they are human and fallible; prey to all the evils that plague up. Even the late Martin Luther King, Jr. use to smoke cigarettes, but that does not make him a spokesperson for the tobacco industry; he still was a leader that sparked a movement.

Former President Jimmy Carter has a brother that was an embarrassment, but he weathered it, even though I think that he was one of the worst presidents we ever had.

I know that with my above statements it may seem like I’m defending the Pope or the Catholic Church---I’m not, but I think that we as a nation of responsible people are losing our focus by being too intent on one aspect and not looking at others. It does not excuse what has happened, No, but we are not looking at a much bigger picture outside of any religious organization.

Alright Sweet Things I will leave that subject for now----it is something that should be discussed in a “court of law”. Not debated on a blog at least not on my blog.

I am just happy that my family is healing and moving forward, that light has come into our lives, and that with the rest of the years remaining with my parents it will be better and happier for all of us.

Easter I have to say was wonderful, even if a bit chilly, that didn’t matter, all was love, healing, light and warmth. One couldn’t ask for more.

I wish I could have stayed longer but my demands at work prevented that, and I had to fly back early Monday morning, I flew back without my luggage, Mom is going to wash and press my things and I’ll have them available for when I go back down, this way I can just use an overnight case if I have to. So took a cab to the nearest Bart Station and back to work, shocked my co-workers but what can you do, I have to hit the ground running and a good thing I did.

Lillian is back in her own home now, feeling much, much better, I’m so glad----I missed her abrasive honesty, we had dinner and went to the movies tonight and caught a late night showing of “Clash of the Titans” in 3-D. Lillian wanted to see if it’s better than the old 3-D movies of the 1950’s. She was very impressed and I was entertained.

I talked to her about Lynda’s situation and asked if I did anything to put her marriage in jeopardy, Lillian is acquainted with Lynda, told me that even she could see that this was coming for a long time, I just gave Lynda a chance to think clearly to make a clear decision, she saw Lynda’s boys and how Lynda’s husband was undercutting any discipline to keep them in line. Lillian said that it would be best for Lynda to make a very clean break, even if it means she will never see her boys again.

But according to Lillian, it may not be such a loss for Lynda if she regains her sanity, Lillian likened it to and operation for cancer, even if it is a “cancer of the heart.”

But now as for my situation with Joe that is a different matter.

I have very strong feelings for Joe, granted I’m friends with Frank, but Frank has a lady that he has dated from time to time, so as someone who is serious with me, Frank is not in that picture, even though I do adore him and worry about him as a friend.

But Joe----I told Lillian that I was not sure if I wanted to be married at all, nor was I interested in sharing my home either---that may sound selfish, but I’ve carved out a life for myself that I am very contented with, I am free to come and go as I wish, do as I wish, live as I wish. Would that be fair to Joe?

Lillian told me that it’s more fair to be honest with Joe, because he maybe feeling the same things as well, but that he may not want me to have any false hope of the possibility of marriage or living together. To have these ideas and feelings out in the open is vital.

She did suggest that from a legal point of view it might be helpful for the both of us to have legal rights if both our families live far away from us to make immediate decisions, especially in regards to medical decisions, to at least keep us alive until family can arrive.

So much to think about! I’m not sure. But Lillian is right we do need to have our thoughts and opinions on the table, to be honest with each other. I’m just a little afraid that if I tell Joe how I feel that I might lose him, but if I don’t I would be dishonest and unfair to both of us.

But with that fear is a chance I’ll have to take; I’ll know by tomorrow, he has a day off and doesn’t need to be on duty. I’ll just have to take my courage and my heart into both of my hands and hope for the best, expect the worst and see what comes. I hope I can do this.

For now I’ll put off that worry until tomorrow, right now it was dinner and a movie with Lillian, good thing I drove she demanded at least two beers at dinner. Good for her.

Until Later Sweet Things.

Friday, April 2, 2010

A phone call~~~

Hello Sweet Things,

My Mother and I are going shopping in a few minutes, Dad is at work, Baby sis is with her husband to be (eventually).

While Mom was getting ready I got a phone call from Joe, he said a number of sweet things to me and asked me to seriously consider something which could mean a change in my life, he doesn't want to rush me, as he said "we have all the time in the world."

He is seriously considering retiring from his job and looking at taking another and yes he is a police officer, he wants to stay in that line of work but in another location, away from the Bay Area, but he knows I have my life as well. So he said he'll hang in there until I'm sure about my decision as well. No rush, no time constraints he knows I have commitments as well.

He was married once, a long time ago, she died---cancer, no children, so he knows it means changes in how we live and commit ourselves and our life styles.

He said to not think about it now, to enjoy family and friends, and then later we'll put our ideas and feelings on the table, I could only agree, so we shall see sweet things, we shall see.

Mom is ready so we're off.

Later Sweet Things and Happy Easter.

Home is where the heart is~~~

Hello Sweet Things,

I'm here with my family for Easter, every one's in bed except me and Trixie the dog, I'm at my Dad's computer and she is at my feet, waiting for me to turn in.

Just too wound up today, and I don't know why. Flew down on an evening flight from Oakland Airport, I'm glad I took a taxi to the terminal and only packed one bag. It only confirmed for me the train is the way to go.

Even that evening everyone trying to get a flight, some on standby, and even though it's local still had to check everything.

If I have to I can fly, but I really don't feel secure on something so 'iffy', the ratio of thrust to lift to mass, technically they say that the bee can't fly, yet it does, technically a piece of "tin" shouldn't fly, yet it does, but if it drops---kiss everything good-bye.

Mom said that if I want to buy a few things and leave them here I could, I just might do that, we're going to do a little shopping tomorrow and she has a closet and bureau in the sewing room so I can leave things there, mostly casual stuff and toothbrush, comb and such. It would be less to pack, especially if I have to take the plane again.

And Dad going to be baptized in the Catholic Church! A Miracle and one that I'm glad about.

I talked to Joe on the phone earlier this evening, he's going to work Easter Evening, to cover for one or two of the men who have families, he sounds good, Lillian is still at her son's house, her other son is checking her house, she is doing fine, said she'll be home next Tuesday. I'm glad I miss her company.

And Baby sis graduating this June, but she's going right back for her Master's, she said that she's going to skip the graduation ceremonies, she feels the one for her master's will be more important, Dad kept asking her if she was sure and she said she was, it would be more fun and relaxing just to have a special party at home. She said she didn't want all that graduation stuff to clutter up her thoughts.

Mom's little business is doing well, she has a couple of wedding gown's in the works, and both will be ready for the June dates, she refused to do the bride's maid dresses, and a couple of suits for a Great Gatsby to do. She's done a couple of hats and is sewing gloves. I managed to pack some vintage patterns for her that I found at a thrift store in the City, she loved them.

Oh, oh Dad is here, and telling me time for bed. So to bed I must go.

Nity Night Sweet Things