Beware, or I'll eat you alive.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

The Diary continues---shocks and changes

March 10, 2009 6:30 p.m.

Lillian came by earlier and brought in my mail and newspaper, I had given her a key to my house, so she can come and go without having to get me out of bed, more Chicken Soup but also some fresh baked, sweet French bread, “Just heat it a little in the oven” she said, but it was so fresh and the smell is so wonderful, it made me think of quaint side walk Bistros in Paris.

She couldn’t stay, one of her friends was coming by to pick her up and they are going ---are you ready for this?---Bowling---she’s on this Senior Bowling Team and she plans to help beat this other team in some sort of Bowling competition---more power to her.

Resting has helped and it seems that a fever is trying to break, I keep sweating on and off, drink hot Chamomile tea and take plenty of fluids is always the best. Yoshi will be coming over later with some more cold meds and Kleenex as well as the updates I need.

Frank called to see how I was doing and to offer any help, and so did Joe, he told me that Frank called him to let him know. I owe each and everyone one of them for their help, I am in their debt.

Yoshi has arrived and we will review things, at least she got her Flu shot and she says I most likely was contagious the few days before I developed the symptoms. I hope she’s right I’d hate for her to come down ill.

March 10, 2009 8 p.m.

Yoshi has left to go home, she’s taking Wednesday off and said that Dan will cover my clients until she goes back on Thursday. I was going to go back to bed but I got another call this time from baby sis, she said she wasn’t coming up for Spring Break and that plans had been changed.

What she told me has my mind reeling. Ever since last Christmas, she said, there have been changes and that she and Mother wondered if Father is the same person.

When she told me what happened I asked her if something hit him in the head to cause this change, and she said to me “You are what hit him in the head, at least verbally”

After I left to go home but before New Years, Father sat Mother and baby sis down at the dinning room table and started to ask questions. All kinds of questions, their desires and goals what they liked and disliked, and then he told them what he liked and disliked. Then he asked them what they wanted that would make things easier and more comfortable..

Baby sis said that Father listened to them very carefully and it was one of the longest evenings they had, they wrote things out and formulated a plan, there had to be compromises, but it was all workable.

Baby sis said that Geek-wanna-be boyfriend is out of the picture, he had been told by Father to not come by the house that since she (baby sis) was not interested in getting married but focusing on getting a degree and a career that he should not pin any marriage hopes on her. Father told Geek-wanna-be that he (Father) wants baby sis to discover life and find out what she wants in life and that maybe marriage, especially at a young age would create greater dissatisfaction as baby sis got older

Next, Father bought and had installed for Mother a dish washer, one that is just right for the household, and he bought a brand new refrigerator that looks old fashion like the old Frigidaire's but is frost free---now that was not cheap, I know how much they cost because I bought one for my house--- Alright sweet things, I love old things, but I want modern conveniences too. Both of these items have saved Mother a lot of extra work and are more efficient.

And, shocks of shocks, he bought a combination radio/phonograph/ tape player-recorder and CD player----but it looks old fashioned, right out of the 1930’s but its modern, it even has a table that matches the style of the old phonographs of that period. Baby sis said it blends right in with the old furniture. But there are some restrictions, the PBS radio stations are permitted and classical music and there is a news radio program that he likes, but it is not to be turned on at dinner time.

While she is telling me these things I’m thinking that I am having a delusional dream but no, it’s real. I asked her where did Father get the money and she said that Father “Opened the wallet and let the moths fly out”, he had been saving and saving not only in his retirement fund, and in the regular savings account but also in a savings account that Mother was not aware of.

This was my Father??? I asked her again “Are you sure Father didn’t slip and fall somewhere and hit his head?” Baby sis said no, but she remembered what I had written to her about in a long letter that I sent to her via Ms. Lambe.

So she told Father that many people were looking for old things but didn’t want to lose the modern conveniences, but what they do to conceal them. And she gave him a lot of examples. Baby sis told me that Father said that there were many changes that he was not happy with, and didn’t feel comfortable and felt that a number of them didn’t belong in their house, but that some things could be acceptable. And he was willing to work with them, Mother and baby sis were willing to work with these compromises, currently no television or Internet, but they could use the Internet connections at the Library.

Baby sis said that if she could figure out a way to bring the Internet into the house without it feeling like a threat to Father she was going to work on that and for me to think of ideas---Me!! Think of ideas?? When I’m trying to absorb all this new information on top of the Flu???!!!

They’ve taken Father to a few antique shops, but the biggest revelation to Father is when they took him to a Vintage antique show sponsored by an Art Deco Society.

“You should have seen Father’s eyes pop out” said baby sis, “And Mother was in Heaven” it seems that since Mother sews her own clothes some people have asked if she could sew up a few dresses for them. Father made the very big commitment for Mother to purchase modern patterns that are reproductions of vintage styles in different sizes. But, and this was a very big revelation, “There was a group of people who were selling CD’s of music they recorded. Songs from the 20 through the 40’s, Father heard them and he liked it, so he bought a couple of the CD’s!”

At the Vintage Art Deco Show, baby sis met a young man that she likes that goes to the same college she does and is in a couple of her classes, so she introduced him to our Parents. It seems he loves Art Deco and old fashioned things but his personality is totally different friendly, outgoing, balanced, and he’s been to the house a couple of times for dinner and all 4 of them have long talks over coffee about the world and likes and dislikes. So far Father seems to like him.

I almost fainted when baby sis told me that.

Baby sis said that Mother added some bright colored pillows to the couch and chair, and some pretty crocheted dollies, she even picked up some nice vases at the thrift store and put those silk flowers in them and they’ve brightened up the rooms, it’s so much more cozy, comfortable and inviting.

So Mother is making extra money sewing, and is planning to take classes in hat making.

And there is more, but ---and here is where even I had to take a deep breath----baby sis asked if I could come down and stay a few days over the Easter period in April. I’ve never gone to visit them at Easter, but baby sis was insistent. “Don’t drive, come down by train, we’ll pick you up” it seems that it was Father’s idea.

Baby sis says that I have to see what is happening, and she implied that maybe it might be a good thing for Father and I to be on ‘speaking terms’ again, to see the changes. I have agreed to go down, but I told her I had to make some arrangements as Easter time is always difficult to get any vacation time, and I would up date her as soon as I was able.

I knew that since that Christmas when I send letters to Mother she reads them and then gives them to Father to read, but instead of him destroying it like he did with the others he just gives it back to her, but, says baby sis, now Father is saying little things like “I’m glad our daughter is doing well” ‘Our Daughter’???!!! That is a change, I thought, what has happened? Plus it’s alright for baby sis to call me long distance, provided it’s evening or night rates, unless it’s an emergency, and she can receive letters from me at the house.

So here I am, sick and feeling weak, I’m hearing things that are making me think that I’m hallucinating, but no they are real, I played back my answering machine and I hear baby sis’s voice just as I picked up. And now all this.

I know it is impossible for such sudden changes to happen in a man who has been inflexible for so many years, the only thing I could think of is that he is ill, perhaps with cancer and is trying to make up for things before he dies.

Before I hung up I asked baby sis to try and find out if Father is well and what to watch for, but she says that he hasn’t shown any of those symptoms, and is not planning on taking a retirement either, as a matter of fact even though there has been some reductions in the company that he’s working at, through attrition and a hiring freeze, they’ve asked him to stay on and not take a retirement because he knows so much of the workings of the company.

I knew that the company that he works for is in good financial shape (although not great) and should be able to weather things, so for him to retire would really be at his convenience, but for him to say he’d stay on told me that maybe he wasn’t ill. So now I have a sort of mystery on my hands, but I won’t have any answers until I travel down.

For now I’ll put it to one side, and focus on getting better from this Flu, my fingers are tired and slipping.

Until later Sweet things, stay well and be healthy.

P.S. Would that I currently look as beautiful as Ava, but right now I'm with a red nose, red eyes, flannel P.J's and Robe, fuzzy wuzzy slippers, an achey body and head, and carrying my box of Kleenex (Oh pooh --aaachoo!) Not so very glamoures. But determined to get better.

3 comments:

Fram said...

Parents often learn from their children, I think. It sounds like this is what is happening.

Keep working on that chicken soup. It'll cure you or kill you.

TheChicGeek said...

Hello Diva :) It sounds like your Father is on a good path. Sometimes as people age they begin to appreciate the truly important things like relationships with people and family. How lovely if things continue on this path. I hope they do.
Hope you feel better very soon!

PS: I love the picture of Ava on the bed...black and white photos from that era are always powerfully moving :)

Mean Kitty said...

Hey Diva, I agree it sounds like what you said has started to make your Dad see things differently.

But go slow, changes like that are hard for some people to do, its like trying to learn how to smile, when all youve done is frown your whole life. What he's done so far are very big steps for him. Don't you and your sister push him too hard, let him learn as his own speed.

And this feller that your sister seems to like, well let's hope that goes well.